tWIstEd [ Pilot ]

[LMN]

[ Welcome to the fanfic that will twist your views of Harvest Moon DS and all the characters that belong in it. On the surface, the Valley seems peaceful and kind enough, but under that mask--the mask shielding every one's "pretend" mediocre lives--lies deep, dark secrets that everyone is trying to hide and that everyone is trying to find out. Forget-Me-Not Valley; perfectly normal? Please.]

[LMN]

Forget-Me-Not Valley is a peaceful town with limited modern conveniences. For example, there is not a single bathroom in the whole entire town so the villagers are forced to pollute their rivers and lakes, and actually, there is only one river and only two lakes.

There are nearly thirty people who come in and out of this place. Most of them lead pathetic lives that follow the same pattern every single day.

Most of the time they wake up, walk out of the house, head for some silly destination like the Goddess Pond, the beach, or some very polluted lake, stay there for countless hours doing nothing at all, then head back when the sun sets. If you had any bit of excitement in your life, you'd most definitely hit the bar when it opened. Otherwise, you were stuck back at home doing absolutely nothing.

Now, you would expect these people--these simple minded people who lead simple lives--to be perfectly nice and innocent. After all, there isn't much to do in this town so the only violence that could really occur would be someone getting chased by a hoe, or someone chasing one, if you know what I mean.

Looks are everything and everything is a lie. { =D Amber that that once }

These villagers may not be so simple and innocent. Who said that everybody was friendly? Who even knows that the heck they do when they stare, for countless hours, at a polluted lake, or even stay for countless hours standing in the same spot?

Beyond the innocuous appearance of this village lies dark secrets that only the privileged, or the twisted ever find out out. Who knows? Maybe they're all a little tWIstEd.


&&&


It is here, in fair Verona--I mean, a small, pathetic farm--that we lay our scene.

Miyabi, owner of the Candy Pop farm, along with Kaoru, also owner of the Funny farm, had almost just experienced the more pathetic display of inability to fight back they had ever seen, had they not seen asleep.

The Harvest Goddess, rumored as being all badass, living at the bottom of a polluted lake, (and yes, some villagers were desperate enough to do such a thing to the Goddess's pond), praised by many villagers and towns, adored by all the Harvest Sprites, kept the Witch Princess's evil at bay and yet, she couldn't even navigate through time and space?

The Harvest Lord was a rather touchy fellow. If he hated being bald, why doesn't he make himself some hair, being a lord and all? Anyway, this guy, being the sensitive man he is, got offended by a comment from the Harvest Goddess. Yes, men really do cry over being called bald.

To make a long, annoying game intro short, the Harvest Lord sent the Harvest Goddess, along with 101 Harvest Sprites, away to another universe of sorts, which probably could have, and should have, been avoided.

But, it did happen and someone had to fix it. So who to turn to? The two girls who the Harvest Goddess had been visiting right before she got zapped, of course.

The Witch, who supposedly hated the Goddess, brought it upon herself to force these two girls to bring her "rival" back. Conclusion: The Witch is the crapiest "villain" ever.

Miyabi and Kaoru were awake, sitting in their farm house, which, in reality, didn't deserve to be called a house at all, just getting done with listening to the Witch explain things to them.

"BRING THE GODDESS BACK SO THAT I WONT FEEL SO LONLEY. Okay? До свидания!!" Then with a flash of neon pink light, she was off.

"Oh dayam. Did she just cast a spell on us?"

"I think she was speaking a different language." The blonde said.

"I think that was German."

"No way, it was totally Canadian."

"Oh please, she didn't say "eh" at the end of her sentence." Miyabi rolled her eyes.

"I dont know, it kind of sounded like she went "До свиданияehhhhhh?!" to me."

Miyabi sighed, "Let's just go out and pick up grass or something. Maybe this town has some hot boys." Miyabi headed for the broken door which should have recently been repaired.

"Do you think the Harvest Sprites are sexy, Miyabi?" Kaoru asked, following after her friend.

"Of course they are." Miyabi assured her, leaning against the door to push it open. Yes, it didn't even lock so all one had to do was push. Unfortunately, Miyabi leaned a little too much into it, and the door collapsed leaving Miyabi crashing to the ground.

"Ooh~ I think the door is trying tell you you're fat." Kaoru laughed.

Miyabi growled and picked herself up, "Come on, let's go molest some guy." This was actually something she enjoyed doing. It was a rather effective way to relieve anger.


&&&


Rock looked over his merchandise. To the looker, it appeared as if he was simply observing the plants in the Inner Inn. Only few knew better than that though.

Soon the plants would be fully grown and ready to harvest. His eager buys would be crawling back to him, paying him anything for just the smallest amount. Yes, this was a risky business with amazing benefits.

Luckily for him, everyone in this town was slow. No one knew that these plants were more than just plants or that they weren't even fake. But, there was a chance that someone could find out. Rock had that taken care of, however.

That medallion that he wears, it's not just for looks. A small, mechanical device is attached to the back of it. This device prevents the trigger of a high powered laser. This laser will trigger when anyone without the medallion takes the plants out of the Inn lobby.

You see, Rock had sneaked into Daryl's lab one night and with the help of a secret accomplice, he was able to get possession of this laser. He installed it in the roofs of the Inn that very night. The laser was small and undetectable unless you really looked.

If the laser really does happen to go off, it will aim itself at the plant, burning it.

[ excuse my Without a Paddle reference ]

The plant will burn and the "high" creating fumes will be released. Being slow, primitive people, everyone will think the high was from the lack of oxygen due to the carbon monoxide that smoke contains. Actually, Rock doubted they even knew what carbon monoxide was. They would probably ignore the whole thing all together once the initial fire was out.

Yes, Rock was a smart one.

Then Luke--er, Lumina, walked in. Rock jumped. He needed a way to distract the women/man/it he admired so.

"Yo, Lumina!" He called out, walking over to her/him/it, a smile on his face.

She merely looked at him as if he were a joke. Oh, little did she/he/it/cactus know that Rock could be the one to make her happier than she had ever dreamed.

Drug wise, that is.

Or maybe...the other kind of way too.

Poor Rock.

"How about we go somewhere, Lumina? The Goddess pond, lake, landfill....hey, what's a landfill?"

Lumina rolled her eyes, "You're slow, aren't you?"

"Yeah, that's what she said."

"...what?"

Rock stared at her blankly, "That's what she said. You know..."

"No, I dont. Who's 'she'?"

"Let's just go somewhere. If you're lucky, I'll give you a kiss~" he teased, trying to be seductive. It failed.

"You are such a pervert!" Lumina cried, storming out of the Inn, which was strange. What kind of girl, or gender confused man, would not want to be kissed by a guy of decent sexual appeal?

In any event, Rock was just glad to have her away from his pot.


&&&


Miyabi and Kaoru paraded around the town and searched for any hot men they could find. They only found a few that were slightly decent looking at best. Even the flirt watering the Inner Inn's plants wasn't nearly as hot as they had liked.

It was well into night when they came to the end of their search. It had taken them a long time because they had to introduce themselves to all the pleasant (psych!) town members. And there was that little girl who threatened to send them into the depths of Oblivion if they didn't beat up another little kid.

They beat up the other little kid.

Then his father had something to say about that. The father had some sort of eye condition so it was easy for the two girls to kick him and run.

But then the guy's wife found out. Her huge, secretary glasses were the key to her power. All Miyabi had to do was steal them. It left the woman helplessly on her knees searching for them, even though a normal human being would most certainly be able see right in front of her without her glasses.

From there they ran to the badass villa on the top of a hill.

Without giving it any thought, and because the door was unlocked, the two girls ran inside, hiding from the family they just humiliated.

Inside, Lumina was at the piano, just playing away at a solemn tune, "Oh Rock, will we ever be together? I know I have treated your poorly--but it is only because I don't know how to express my love. No- it's because I can't express my love! My love for you is forbidden, for I am not who you think I am~" the sad it sang as it played.

"Hey chick, are you okay?" Miyabi asked, approaching her.

Lumina jumped and let out a small scream of surprise. She quickly turned to give the both of them a death glare, "Say that you heard anything and I will eat your babies!" then she ran off and up the stairs. The sound of a door slamming could be heard.

Both girls blink twice then ran out a fast as they could.

"Im going home. These people freak me out." Kaoru shivered.

"It's amazing~" Miyabi smiled, amused with the whole town.

"I guess if you look at it like that..." Kaoru turned to walk away, "Be careful. If you died, I'd have to pay for everything myself." and she walked.

Miyabi wondered what it would be like to steal Kaoru's things while the poor girl was cluelessly sleeping.

Just as Miyabi was about to venture around the town more and, in all desperateness, molest Rock, someone walked out of the mansion. Scared to death that it was the melancholy freak who might kill her children one day, Miyabi jumped and spun around, ready to knock that freak out.

But it was not Lumina. It was an angel, or least, someone who looks like an angel.

"Bow chika wow wow."

The silver haired man, who made Miyabi want to touch herself, appeared to not have heard that comment, for he walked right up to you saying,

"A fair maiden is walking alone, at this hour?" His voice was pure femininely goodness, "Why don't you let this prince take your hand and walk you home? For someone of such beauty--it must not be safe to be left by herself."

The same could be said about him, however, Miyabi didn't tell him this. She was too busy staring down at this man. Yes. Staring down, as in, looking at his crotch.

"Sleep with me."

"One night, my maiden, we will sleep under the stars; it will be just the two of us."

Miyabi frowned, "No, I mean, I want to have se-"

"THIEF!" Lumina screamed, running out of the mansion doors and pointing at the beautiful boy, "I WILL RAPE- I mean, EAT, YOUR CHILDREN!"

Mr. Wonderful turned to Miyabi and smiles at her, "Heh, looks like I've got to run." Before taking off, he looks to Lumina, "Will will see you in my dreams tonight~"

"Oh!" Lumina squealed, blush on her face, "Rock! I am afraid that I have another man pulling at my heart! Oh~ what bittersweet love affair!" and with that, she ran back into the mansion.

Miyabi lets the pretty boy get away, obviously too occupied with looking at him as he walked off to even do anything about the situation.

Before the gorgeous thief walks out of sight, Miyabi shouts to him, "STEAL MY VIRGINITY."

That night, Miyabi had to sleep on the epic fail bed because Kaoru stole the good one. All was not lost though--

She had dreams about that man she met. Im sure you can imagine what was going on in those dreams.